To this day I have no idea how my mom managed as a military spouse with 5 kids, and being a Family Care Provider of 6 kids during the day. I can barely manage 2 as a single parent, and promptly clock out when my kids fall asleep. "Mommy who at 10pm?"
However, what prompted further understanding of a mother's world and mind was derived from a book I read this past week; Please Look After Mom. It is a phenomenal book, where the mom becomes lost in a subway station, and her children begin to really think about her role as a mother, and realize that she too had a life and thoughts beyond that role. At one point in the book, prior to the mom missing, one of the daughters questioned whether or not their mom liked being in the kitchen. All day they would see her preparing meals, and never thought about whether she liked it or not. However, the response of the mother was that it was something that had to be done.
As parents, we just do things that have to be done, and never really think about it. When basic needs are being met to a child, they never realize what kind of life they are living until it is brought up by others, or once they reach a certain age of knowing the difference. A couple weeks ago, I was watching Oprah documenting different lives of women and families in India. The first family she visited, lived in the slums and the children declared they were happy and wouldn't trade anything for their life. However, when she asked the father whether or not he was happy, he didn't feel the same. Breaking down in front of his family, in a living space about the size of my dining room, he stated that he wishes he could do more for his family, so they didn't have to live the way they do. To this day, I wonder if that moment shattered the children's awareness.
Months ago, I was celebrating the custody switch involving my children. Two years of freedom, constantly swirled in my head. Now that their dad and I have become friends, and we have both matured into better parents, I do not feel afraid to let them go. With two years of freedom, I constantly thought of ways of fulfilling them. I first thought of traveling during the holidays, and began saving my vacation dates. Then I thought of moving altogether, and start all over in a place I prefer to be. As the months began to shorten, and anxiety started kicking in, I knew that I couldn't miss another kindergarten year, initiation into sports, the loss of a first tooth, and birthdays.
Awkward as it is to move into the territory of an extended ex-family, I was able to find my piece of land...island to be exact. I would not have imagined this life back in my younger years, but I have found a way to embrace it. Parenting is an amazing adventure. Here you are, presented with this opportunity to guide someone through life, when you haven't figured it out yourself, but you do everything to make it worthwhile, keep the basics in check, and harp on the right and wrongs of life. Only time will tell the outcome, but I'd like to think that I turned out pretty well. I'm sure my mommykins is quite proud :)
However, what prompted further understanding of a mother's world and mind was derived from a book I read this past week; Please Look After Mom. It is a phenomenal book, where the mom becomes lost in a subway station, and her children begin to really think about her role as a mother, and realize that she too had a life and thoughts beyond that role. At one point in the book, prior to the mom missing, one of the daughters questioned whether or not their mom liked being in the kitchen. All day they would see her preparing meals, and never thought about whether she liked it or not. However, the response of the mother was that it was something that had to be done.
As parents, we just do things that have to be done, and never really think about it. When basic needs are being met to a child, they never realize what kind of life they are living until it is brought up by others, or once they reach a certain age of knowing the difference. A couple weeks ago, I was watching Oprah documenting different lives of women and families in India. The first family she visited, lived in the slums and the children declared they were happy and wouldn't trade anything for their life. However, when she asked the father whether or not he was happy, he didn't feel the same. Breaking down in front of his family, in a living space about the size of my dining room, he stated that he wishes he could do more for his family, so they didn't have to live the way they do. To this day, I wonder if that moment shattered the children's awareness.
Months ago, I was celebrating the custody switch involving my children. Two years of freedom, constantly swirled in my head. Now that their dad and I have become friends, and we have both matured into better parents, I do not feel afraid to let them go. With two years of freedom, I constantly thought of ways of fulfilling them. I first thought of traveling during the holidays, and began saving my vacation dates. Then I thought of moving altogether, and start all over in a place I prefer to be. As the months began to shorten, and anxiety started kicking in, I knew that I couldn't miss another kindergarten year, initiation into sports, the loss of a first tooth, and birthdays.
Awkward as it is to move into the territory of an extended ex-family, I was able to find my piece of land...island to be exact. I would not have imagined this life back in my younger years, but I have found a way to embrace it. Parenting is an amazing adventure. Here you are, presented with this opportunity to guide someone through life, when you haven't figured it out yourself, but you do everything to make it worthwhile, keep the basics in check, and harp on the right and wrongs of life. Only time will tell the outcome, but I'd like to think that I turned out pretty well. I'm sure my mommykins is quite proud :)
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