Cheeky Chatty

Bound by the eyes, hands, and shackled feet Lead into an arena of the unknown With a deafening beat of the heart An eerie silence Surrounded by the elements of dry heat, slight wind, and a burning sun Fear causing mental anguish A lump rising in the throat, preventing vocalization Is it better to see whats to happen? Should I turn from possible pain? Should I fight? Should I plead? Overwhelmed with fear, causing a gravitational pull Kneeling, rocking back and forth An eruption of laughter and tears, loosening what was covering the eyes Blinded by light, and focusing on the chained closed sweaty hands Opening to reveal a key Will you free yourself to face whats to come? Will you remain bound, and give up? What will your choice be? Inspiration:   Demi Lovato's Skyscraper

One day at work, a customer I never met before looks at me and asks if I could sing; in which I responded with no.  She then gave me a disappointed look, that was also slightly sour.  Apparently, that wasn't the first time, I have disappointed strangers with my dull life, but it was the first time a look penetrated my outer surface.  At the time, I felt that I should have apologized for not being what she though I was or should be.  In fact, why is it that others seem to think I am not doing what I should be? The other day I was reading my diary.  It is of 12 years old, and I began writing in it during the summer before my senior year of high school.  Continuously, I write for years about how I'm not really doing what I would like to be doing.  Flash forward...same thing.  Constantly, I live in the land of ideas and wishful thinking in my head.  However, the reality of it all is that I'm scared to step out of my comfort zone of a robotic li...

Twelve years ago I dreamed of one of my many deaths.  For the first couple of years I dismissed it.  However, when September 11 occurred, I became scared and distraught.  Later on, I began to investigate my dream, and now I see it as a work of art.  Many forms of art lie all around, but the most interesting ones can be found in a dream of death that begins with the moment of suspense, through the will power of life, and the masterpiece end of defeat. My canvas begins with myself and others lying asleep around a tan colored truck in a desert atmosphere.  I had long hair, and was dressed in a brown t-shirt and light brown camouflage pants, and suede untied boots.  Suddenly I'm running.  I'm running through the desert, houses, backyards, clothes-lines, climbing fences, and continue to run through more desert.  Before long, I was at an empty tavern.  It was cool and clean, and everything made of mud-brick.  I go out the back door and see m...

This past weekend, I took my kiddies on a nature walk at the National Wildlife Center .  We had not been in a while, and I decided to take them to see what interesting things occurs in nature following a rainfall.  The day was sunny, early and slightly hot...nonetheless, perfect.  We walked over a bridge, which was absent of water lilies or pads, and took note of the rise in the water level.  The gravel road seemed washed and remnants of a silt water path was still visible.  Eagerly, we walked to the trail that led into the trees. Along the woodland trail, we heard geese, seen herons, spiders and different types of mushrooms.  We continued to walk along the lake, as mosquitoes danced on us without biting, and everything seemed alive and wet.  When we turned around, Ari began to run ahead, and continued to pick up various sticks, until I noticed how one stick didn't seem too familiar up ahead.  As I yelled for her to stop, I looked at t...

I don't want to seem insensitive, but really...everywhere you turn nothing seems positive.  Even the neighbor who chased a man down, that kidnapped a little girl, has left the news stream, and now all you see is plastic..I mean plastered entertainment news of Kim Kardashian's wedding.  Which no one gives a damn about.  I'm not even interested in how they found a dress to fit her ass, because she's not the only one with a badunkadunk. Also, just today, I somehow stumbled upon a link that shows a slight concern of China's military buildup.  Should we be the only ones fortified in force, in the world?  I realize the greater threat of a country being an equal threat to our military, but I did find a slight humor in our government's cunning smile and politely saying, " Watch yourself...".   Needless to say, I was searching all over the world today for some happy teary eyed news, and didn't find anything.  I even though it would be humorous to see Bear...

Sometimes you do all you can do to, in an attempt to create a healthy environment.  However, no matter what the elements are, you try hard as hell to create something that just cannot be, for that moment in time.  Internally, you try to rationalize what you may be doing wrong and end up overdoing everything right, not realizing that you are not the issue. For months, weeks, and days, I have wanted to have a conversation with a certain someone.  I wanted to let him know the dungeon he created, in which we lived in; and how I waited patiently for him unlock the doors, and allow us access to the rest of the castle.  Unfortunately, I recently realized that it would not be worth while.  For me, it will most likely open old wounds, and for him an unrecollected dubious past.  Denying the obvious facts of being a functional alcoholic. Either way, I accept my life for what it was, and I neither have any ill will nor malcontent; but best wishes.  Life d...

While sipping my cocktail and checking my various dating websites; I can't but help notice how they suck.  Why do I have to pay to see who viewed my profile?  Why do I have to pay to check my messages?  Where does the money go?  Unlike my childcare website, you pay for membership fees and access to a gigantic database of babysitters, child care and Au pair information; as well as the ability to view background checks, references, and reviews.  However, on dating websites, there aren't STD reports, background checks, or discounts to restaurants (good idea!).  So why isn't it a free service like...hmmm, social websites? In retrospect, trying the whole dating thing sucks.  I don't go out, and I easily loose interest in looking...and it's only been a couple of days!  Also, I don't know if I have the capabilities of dating a civilian.  I have yet to date anyone outside the military.  Officially, I have not dated since...'06.  Therefore,...